Monday, December 8, 2008

Holding Steady

Hello dear ones! After a week of a nasty chest cold, and fatigue so suppressive, I couldn't keep my head up, and onto otc's that cleared it instantly........well, that was quit the rollercoaster. Yet, under it all, I am still feeling like a container filled with light and peace.

My family, seems to be moving in a more gentle way with each other as well. We just seem to be more cuddly and less crusty (you know, auto-pilot and disgruntled-ness do to overt amounts of stress). Crust Busting I have heard it called. Living full out with love and letting things "go with the flow". Reaching outside of comfort zones and habits to make the effort and say "Love you too" without words. So nice.

All this fatigue and sickness squelched plans for holiday merriment. No Phinney Ridge Winter Festival (and visits to dear friends who sold their Wiley Wares and Luma-ntion the night). (They are my inspiration for the week. See sideBARS) My body forced me to rest and rest I did. I needed to save all the energy up for a promise to a 5 year old.

On Sunday, we enjoyed the mindblowing Pacific Northwest Ballet's Nutcracker. The sets were mindblowing, the overall effect, magical. Even then, I wanted to nap during the Dance of the Sugarplum Fairies. But what a magical place to catnap. I woke up wanting candy. Hmmm. lol.

And now, a Zometa week. Last week, was one of the first weeks since the very beginning where I thought "Now it is time to reach out. To help get through these last weeks. I am so tired and I am just not finding the breaks of energy anymore". I am like a Seattle-ite, waiting for "sunbreaks" in winter, only they used to be "energy'-breaks". Still, a peaceful feeling, and sometimes tears when I am SO tired I can't help but get weepy. Not sad. It is weird. Like being pregnant and hormonal. I just let tears slip down my cheeks from fatigue.

So, anyone wanting to help out this week with a run to the library (my books our SO overdue. I keep waiting for my energy to return!). Or a pot of soup would be most welcome. I know I still have many offers. And for awhile, didn't need them. But, it is time again - to ask. I am having a hard time managing much of anything right now. My legs feel like jelly. So, Sharon MIGHT be the person to ask - since brain cells and "keeping up" seem to be turn off right now.

Much love, peace, and cat-purring joy,

1 comment:

MiMi said...

Love to you daughter and love the pix!!
Been off the air myself with knee but on the mend and ready for the flight out there in 1 week a day.

Hang in there the mommy hug is on the way!! You have been so wonderful on this journey and I am so proud of you, and amazed at those you have touched without even knowing it on this coast!!

Papi and I are ready for a trip the the west coast and what looks like a white Christmas!!
See you in a week.
Love from the heart