So I have been waiting for this little big movie called Soul Surfer to come out on DVD. I get this kid, in some ways, in many. She lost on arm. You may be overcoming a chemo drugs side effects that took down your way of life (for now), or trying to get your head above the waterline of an abusive relationship, or finding your way home after being lost, for whatever reason, divorce, economic hardships, accidents. The is a WHOLE HOST of learning opportunities we place before ourselves that permanently alter the WAY we live. And I do, it can really feel oppressive, and never-ending, but it is going to end, there is an end to the pain, the suffering AND the triumphs and the good times.
And this movie lived up to expressing the answer to the questions from others, or the questions I pose to the Supreme Being: "WHAT just happened? WHY did it happen? WHEN will it end? HOW am I going to get there?" and the good ole "You sure you think lil ole ME can do this?!"
(To that last question, it is usually on a day when feel like one ole measly twig that can break under all the pressure. And to which I can totally hear my daughter saying, "Yeah, but then you'll have two things to lean on for support instead of one.")
Right now, I am coming back up into my strength after a close brush when dying, and having to start all over....I ask these questions a lot. And yes, I cry sometimes, deeply, wondering if God got this right. Me? Suppose to get through all of this? And then I look around and realize I am not at all cornered on the market for "lots of tough stuff to deal with....".
My take home message: YOU probably haven't been the only one down a similar path. Yes, your path is indeed unique to you. However, fear, overcoming, pain, triumph....thank God God didn't only give those answers to gurus, and the people writing Self Help books. It pretty much is all around.
Look to someone else's journey, and ask yourself what did they do. Don't judge or measure yourself to against them. See what they did when they hit the proverbial brick wall and, even if you don't feel it to be true, try it on for size.
My favorite, the ancient, time test and approved by most major religions, self-help books, and Oprah, is the "take it day by day" approach. Easy to use instructions built right in. :)
If you try to live more than today at a time, is when you become the biggest puddle heap of uselessness on the floor. It also CAN be a sneaky way out of being responsible for getting yourself out without having to face the fears that put you there on the floor - crying - with no Kleenex left. Think about it, if you said "I HAVE to be at the TOP of that MOUNTAIN - NOW or I am doomed to a hellish existence forever and ever with a scarlet 'LOSER' tattoed on my forehead so all anyone will see is how bad it was" - well, you wouldn't expect me to be able to do it.
But - when we break that journey down, to what is ONE step today? We can open our eyes, and try one new thing to get ourselves there moving, even if it is just zipping open the tent, pouring some coffee and talking to a mountaineer who has conquer that snowy behemoth in front of you. (Even if said expert had frostbite, and a missing finger, you still would probably trust that the journey is doable).
So don't break the path yourself. Find your inspiration. Take notes, make a Step One plan.
Oh, and that fear that has you on the ground. It can be your gift. If you have the courage to ask "Okay, so what if that fear IS true, what will happen? And then?" USUALLY it clears up how much fear of nothing we've carried along the journey with us. And TYPICALLY it is well meaning friends and family hanging their fears and baggage on you. Just compassionately, but most definitely, hand it back. Then at least, your only trying to carrying your load for the climb.
OH, but this is a surfer movie, nooot a climber movie...so I should switch back on my analgies and metaphors to water, and sharks, and one arms giants of Soul. Soul Surfer? Cute, slightly saccharine, but still totally true to this girl, this family, and what it takes to not be permanently in a state of fear.....
Blessings on the journey,