Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Forgot my titles again...blah....uhm...UPDATE

Once again, I have to start out this blog by pouring out the gratitude for everyone's messages of belief in me, the practical support, friendship, inspiration. I did a collage awhile back. I will have to scan and post it. It is of a man, diving backwards from the stars, and below him in the dark abyss, are a circle of men stretching out their hands to catch him. That image just keeps popping to mind everytime I think of this wonderful support that is allowing just to relax into this process because I know I have people not only watching, but actively reaching out their hands to catch me. Again, I am honored.

Now, onto the physical update:
Because the cancer has spread to so many places, it appears our shift in care is refocusing on stopping it spreading anymore, possibly getting some of it to diminish (I am unclear here and need to talk to the medical oncologist her intentions) and then holding it in remission with drugs.

Radiation will help get the veterbra (yes, I have a site on a vertabrae) to remain stable and intact and end the pain I have been experiencing. THAT would be great. If I sneeze, I am on the floor cussing. So, yes, I will be doing radiation if it will help the pain go away!

I start chemo next week, and trying to plan the start of radiation soon as well. So, be prepared for baldy ;) I plan to henna my head if I am allowed! hehehehe. I may also go get a short haircut and dye it purple or something crazy I have always wanted to try. But I will at least cut it short.

This week, I have a few more tests to peek into my body to see if it has spread where they haven't yet checked.

Good news is, the cancer cells are very likely to respond very well to a newer drug out there, that will stop them from growing so rapidly (maybe stop them?? Not sure).

So still gathering information, SO much to go through and understand.

I know some of you have taken this hard. One person I talked to, it took days for her to call. She was afraid her saddness would upset me. But instead, our conversation gave me such a surge of strength that I really needed on a bad day. Thanks dear friend.

Okay, going to go shower. Having a good day. Finally able to eat (managing stress better) and that has given me back some good energy.


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