First of all. I am so humbled, touched, in awe...of the profound generosity of the community around me. I just wish I could hold up a mirror that caught the beauty of the people surrounding me, so everyone could see. It isn't just what you are doing, but the look in your eyes, and the energy you are giving off is so free and compassionate.
I think it would look like a beautiful crystal, catching every color in it's purist form. I am honored to have such wonderful people around me in my life. I just wish everyone could see this. Thank you all so very very much. If kindness is a cure, I should be healed in about a day's time. :)
I have decided I am going to write this blog in three ways:
- I will put PRACTICAL SUPPORT in the entries that are the nuts and bolts of what we are needing in a practical way.
- I will put HEALTH UPDATE for entries talking about any news on that front.
- and I will put JENNA'S JOURNEY for those entries more personal essay-like. Letting you know what is going on inside my head/heart/spirit. I bet those will get long winded and wandering. So skip if you feel the need. :P hehehehe.
Updates on the health front:
Started my series of testing to see how far this has spread. No answers yet. Just tests. I should be glowing in the dark here pretty soon! When you enter a room that has a radioactive warning sign on it, and a lady puts an IV in your vein...well, you take a deep breath and laugh about your newfound "glow". Yes, I laughed a lot.
And talked a good bit with the nurse and technician. Interestingly, we ended up talking about holistic healing, and where medicine could go next. We talked about missing elements in healing...things that cannot be measured, or graphed, or PET scanned. All this while radioactive chemicals were giving them snapshots of me. Look where technology has taken us, amazing! Look where we are evolving to on a consciousness level that with healing, acknowleding there might be something more going on . You can't put people into x+y=z, and we just don't know why. We also talk about why some people go dark, and others seem to have a peace.
So, I have three days of kicking back. I am not reading anymore. I am just going to get my Zen on. Walk in the park, cook healing food, drink healing tea, meditate on my rock near the creek, and listen and observe. Play with my kid and hubby.
Next week, a host of appointments. I had PET/CT, PIM. Next up, bone scans, mammos, and genetics. Meetings with oncologists (Astrid rocks by the way! THANK YOU!). By Thursday, I will probably know what the doctors are thinking about it all. Their plans.
I then get to decide my own.
School informed us today, much to our surprise and without solicitation, that Bug is welcome to attend all 7 weeks of summer camp, so she can have a place familiar and steady, and with smiling faces. I once again, am humbled at the generosity of those around me. This is a god send, because we were wondering how we were going to pay for the help we needed. Already, it is overwhelming. I didn't realize how much I did until now! Goodness!
I know this has started to wear on Bug. She is happy to have playdates, but is crying about us being gone so much. So, I am going to let her go to the place close to us still, like she wants, two days a week and school camp two to three days a week. And I hope to give her as much down-time as possible to go to the zoo with friends, and have a summertime as well. That is just going to have to be a wait and see kind of thing.
But I am jumping ahead of myself. Next week will let us know a bit more.
Okay, going to go rest my mind now and color with Bug.
Thanks to you all!!!!